just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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