We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
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I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
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But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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