Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
