C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
There r osticjed everywhere
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
