We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Randomize
