i don't like sucking hair
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
