And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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