we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Randomize
