yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
