Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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