The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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