And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his