she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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