thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
