So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
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