hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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