well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize