Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize