she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
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