Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
