fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Randomize