if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I didn't shave. On purpose
It's Friday. Sex?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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