It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
love makes seman taste better
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
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