I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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