you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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