We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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