it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
