Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Yo dont text me then not text me
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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