We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
