Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
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