I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
It's blow job season.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
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