Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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