Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
it's like heaven, but drunker
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?