There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
