hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize
