Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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