i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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