Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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