I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
