You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
