...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
the night ended with taco bell and tears
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize
