then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
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Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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