I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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