in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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