Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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