I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Boobs speak an international language.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
