you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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