he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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