I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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