Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
