chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Randomize
